Was Lincoln gay?
Signed,
Just Curious
Dear JC,
Yeah, yeah, I've read the book reviews in
recent weeks, too. There's a "scholarly" new dissertation
devoted to all things the long-legged Lincoln was supposedly
thinkin'.
But here's all you need to know: Abe Lincoln
was tall, he was smart and he helped abolish slavery. Nothing
else really matters.
At the same time, I find it endlessly amusing
to note that Lincoln was a Republican. And a guy can't help
wondering which other beloved Republican icons might have skeletons
in their closets.
That shouldn't matter, either. But for some
reason it apparently does.
Jones
Dear Dr. Jones,
What's all this about a Social Security crisis?
Is it really as dire as the prez says? What's in it for him? And
what are we supposed to do?
Signed,
If It Ain't Broke ...
Dear IIAB,
Crisis? What crisis? These Bush hooligans are
trying to change the world and make it safer for rich people.
That's never been a secret and it becomes more apparent every
damn day.
To privatize Social Security is to funnel more
money into the coffers of Bush's stock-market cronies. What should
we do? Complain, kvetch, moan, protest. Fight the power.
The only good news I can see is that, as of
right now, the current scorched-earth administration is more than
half done. That's not much consolation, but it's something.
Hang on, world, hang on!
Jones
Is all the folderol about Johnny Carson really necessary?
I mean, here's a guy who hasn't been on TV for, like, a dozen
years. And he had a job that just about anybody could do.
Signed,
Totally Vexed
Dear TV,
Folderal? Carson remained funny and never went
out of style for more than 30 years in an industry where the average
is closer to 30 days (if not 30 seconds).
A job just about anybody could do? I'm guessing
you're not very smart, not very funny or not very old. Or all
of the above.
May a weird holy man relegate your TV to Craig
Kilborn reruns for all of eternity.
Jones